Thursday, November 15

old soul.

i have not a spontaneous bone in my body.
I like to stay home and finish homework on weekends. 
it shocks my friends when i say yes to going out. 
i love a good candle.
i told my mom that all i wanted from the grocery store is carpet freshener. 
and that i can't think of anything i want for christmas cause i have most everything 
(WHO THE HELL SAYS THAT?)
i go on dates with my parents..without a date of my own. 
i fall asleep with derek every night over skype. 
we also use skype to do everything normal couples do in real life-
movie nights, in-home spa dates, cook dinner 'together', read-a-thons.
I can't stop playing Hay Day on my phone. 
i got excited about a pair of winter boots.
i nanny too many hours a week because parents think i'm a miracle worker with children
- really i just bribe them with every possible thing needed for survival. 
my teachers and i email back and forth constantly on a chummy basis.
the last purchase i made was a 2013 planner that i've shown off to anyone who'll listen.
i save all my money. i take long naps. sweats are my favorite. 
and if you can't tell, all this means i'm in a quarter-life crisis.




help
h

Saturday, November 10

i blogged.

somewhere in between realizing i'm not as funny as was formerly thought or having all of 5 hours to myself in a week, i have abandoned this little love of a blog. but i think i'm back for good.
so here is my life in a nutshell



1. yes. i am back with that kid who i incessantly talk about in some way or another. and just because i am the open book that i am, i'll tell you the why of it all: he was moving to North Dakota so we did the whole 'break up but not really' thing. he stayed a week in provo before the move, where he became too close of friends with a girl for my liking. then, because i am jealous and maybe a little crazy, i decided he wasn't worth my time, we fought, i ignored him for a week, posted dramatic tweets, blah blah blah. obviously, something was not right in his head to think there is something better out there than me. but in retrospect, i couldn't be more grateful that he got a chance to date another girl. because now he's back to being obsessed with me and all is right in the world. and mostly, he has cute dimples that i can't say no to.










2. he changed his life around a whole hell of a lot. so much so, that after 5 years of dating, he's working with his bishop to go on an LDS mission. its seriously crazy, i gave up on that dream like 3 years ago. its funny to think that as of 4 months ago we were planning a wedding for fall of 2013, i think its safe to say that date may be postponed.



3. i changed my life around too. i'll be honest- i started down a dreary path and my life was heading nowhere fast. but i am getting back to a prettier, sunnier path. With that, i plan on taking my family scholarship to BYU to finish school sometime next year. no amount of changing will make me like that idea, but free school is free school. especially when you pay for it all by yourself, with no financial aide  -_-

4.  i dream about zombies almost every night. they're my favorite, most dreaded dreams. i can't tell you why i'm so infatuated, but i hope that's not how the world will end.

5.  speaking of that, i think the world will end in my lifetime. in fact, i'm quite positive of it. though my whole family just thinks i'm a crazy pessimist. 

6. dark burgundy lipstick is the only color i've ever loved on myself. and i'm a firm believer that no matter who you are, you can pull it off. cause its even darker and more purple than oxblood AKA ITS LIKE MAGIC.





6. all 3 nieces of mine are the cutest damn things i've ever laid eyes on. 











7. and lastly, i still live with the rents. and no amount of persuasion could get me to move out.






if you read this, i love you
h